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Pay That Man His Money

Albert Pujols is Half-Man Half-Amazing

I’ve never stated that I know how to run a franchise or have experience in negotiating professional athletes salaries, but how in the world don’t you give Albert Pujols whatever he wants.  I don’t care what the Cardinals have to do to keep Pujols on the team, but they need to do it.  It’s time to start collecting cash from any means necessary.  Start selling your own property, cars, first born childs, collect from your bookies, what have you.  Frankly put,  Pujols is the best hitter I’ve ever seen, and St. Louis needs to do whatever it takes to keep him there. 

We as baseball fans,  have had the privilege to witness the astonishing career Pujols has compiled during his decade in professional baseball.  In 10 years, Pujols has dominated the sport like no other player has ever done.

In case, you haven’t noticed how talented this guy is, let me tell you, he’s a 3-time MVP, 2-time Gold Glover, ’01 Rookie of the Year, and has won a World Series.  In addition, he’s won the Roberto Clemente Award, plenty of Silver Slugger Awards, the Hank Aaron Award twice, a batting title, maintains a career average of 42 HR a year, has had 100+ RBI in all 10 seasons, finished 2nd in MVP voting three times, a career .331 batting average, and recently discovered a cure for cancer.  I mean, really what else does he need to do for the Cards to, as John Malkovich epically stated, “pay that man his money.”

5 Years?  10 years?  You got it, Albert.    The Cardinals need to make this deal happen.  If they don’t, they will be responsible for the eventual collapse of the city of St. Louis.  The Rams have been dismal as of late in post-Warner seasons, and the Blues have never won a Stanley Cup, the Cardinals are what keeps St. Louis sports on the map.  Add in the fact that the bitter rival, Chicago Cubs, will have enough cap space soon to sign Pujols to a deal would lead to a LeBronish farewell to one of the best ever to play for the Cards, and everyone knows Wrigley Field is where careers go to die.  Isn’t that right Alfonso?

According to ESPN and St. Louis GM John Mozeliak, Pujols and the Cardinals have agreed to a noon ET Wednesday deadline for contract extension talks, hopefully a deal will be in place by than, ultimately striking any chance Pujols signs to the always player hungry Yankees or the dreaded Cubbies.

  1. February 15, 2011 at 9:13 pm

    The Cardinals do need to present Pujols with a hefty new contract, but I wouldn’t serve up a contract that exceeds 8 years. In fact I would rather pay him more per year over less years (say 6-8 years) then be stuck with the huge contract of a 40 year old ballplayer who isn’t producing half what he is now. Also I do wonder who much the Union is pressuring Pujols to force a max contract in lue of Cliff Lee taking less years and slightly less money.

    • Hide the women and children.... Here comes "THE UNION"
      February 16, 2011 at 3:17 pm

      Do you think that Union has a lot of impact on Pujols’ decision? I can’t figure out where I fall on this one. I just know that it’s pretty amazing that when the hated A-rod was making a money grab similar to this, I don’t remember the Union getting the finger pointed at them. It was all about how self-centered and greedy Mr. Cameron Diaz was.

      But the media now cant decide who to blame for all of this. You know they cant say one bad thing about their poster boy who single-handedly is going to carry the MLB out of the black could of the steroid-area while reversing global warming and ending world hunger. So since they cant even hint at attacking their media-darling they all scream “Its that Union who is screwing this all up!!!” Like there are a bunch of suited-up Matrix like agents threatening to release Pujols real birth certificate if he doesn’t demand at least $300 million.

      Speaking of which, even if Pujols is exposed for really being 35 years old right now, you still know Jim Hendry will throw him a max 10 year deal. Its just how he rolls

  2. February 16, 2011 at 2:35 pm

    Very true. The bottom line is that Pujols is one of the best hitters we’ve ever seen and the Cardinals need to figure a way to keep him there, but their fan base is good enough where I think a Prince Fielder type would suffice. it’ll be interesting to see what plays out. To me, I just can’t comprehend the significance difference between a $20mil and $30mil deal.

  3. February 17, 2011 at 5:37 pm

    Hmm there seems to be a negative view towards the Cubs in this article….. for those that also dislike the cubs be sure to visit http://www.chitownteez.com and get an Officer Karkovice shirt! This obscure player reference will allow all the other dorks in the bar to spot you and chat you up without any guilty feeling on their part that you might have something better going on.

  4. February 19, 2011 at 2:08 pm

    I heard ChiTownTeez is the hot new t-shirt shop out there. Everyone should check it out.

  1. February 22, 2011 at 5:09 pm

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